Acquitted on 16 charges Texas AG free to do whatever he wants
Paxton - "I'm thinking of trying armed robbery next."
As you are no doubt aware, the Texas Senate has approved of Ken Paxton's disregard of the law. I asked him how he managed to convince the senate to vote to acquit.
“You know Tom, it didn’t really cost me all that much. It was money well-spent. I simply bought a few Texan senators and this annoyance was over. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this earlier.”
Paxton has been without a government paycheck since May when the House impeached him, and was looking forward to having some ‘pocket money’ once again.
“I’ve really missed going out with the guys and spending time with the gals down at Miss Kitty’s saloon.”
As he certified the acquittal, fellow hardline conservative and a big time Paxton fan, Lt. Gov. Dan Patrick praised the acquittal saying, “It’ll be nice having having Kenny around again. The women folk at the bar have really missed his humor and heavy tipping.”
I asked Mr. Paxton what future felonies we might expect to see from the AG.
“Well Tom, with this pesky little matter behind me and Christmas on the horizon, I’m seriously considering armed robbery. I live in Texas, so obviously I’m well armed.”
#AdoptDontShop #SlavaUkraini #HeroyamSlava
#NeverMetACatIDidNotLikeExceptThatBigMeanOrangeCatAtTheEndOfTheBlock