DeSantis - "The only immigrants I want in Florida are retired rich Jews from New York."
"I thought sending them to Martha's Vineyard would motivate them to get rich."
"The only immigrants I want in Florida are rich Jews from New York."
A descendant of immigrants himself, Florida Governor Ron DeSantis says he only wanted to motivate the 50 migrants when he sent them to Martha’s Vineyard.
“I figured that once they saw what America offers it would motivate them,” he told me, seemingly not cognizant of the fact that he was giving an interview to a Canadian Cat. Apparently all press is good press in the GOP.
“God knows that Florida is no motivation. The drugs, violence, homelessness, organized crime, and fucked up state government is no motivation.”
“Spending twelve million dollars of US taxpayer money to show off the riches and opportunities available in America is a small price to pay to keep them from falling into a life of crime and poverty in Florida.”
“Even me, I’m doing my damnedest to get out of this shit hole and move to DC. But right now all I really want a pillowy biscuit from Hardees. So fuck off cat.”
I took to the streets of Tallahassee in an effort to see how Floridians felt about this Nazi-Germany inspired political maneuver. Nazi’s were big believers in shipping people off to their demise during WWII.
So I attempted speak to MAGA mob lieutenant Cletus Cloudy who pulled out an AR-15 as I approached and commenced to take target practice on me.
“Dance you fucking feline liberal piece of shit journalist,” he yelled at me as I fled and grabbed an Uber to the airport.
#AdoptDontShop