Eric Trump - keeping track of dad's friends and enemies
"It's a tricky job. It can change in a minute."
I had a little chat with Eric Trump the other day. Weird guy. He didn’t find it odd at all that a talking cat was asking him questions about his new role in the Trump Klan.
“Dad gave me the job of keeping track of people he hates and people he likes. It changes daily - sometimes hourly. Like Mitch McConnell. He used to love him. Now he hates him.”
“He picked me to do this because I really don’t have any purpose in life. I am forbidden to do anything involving the business and Lara does not want me near her campaign.”
“I babysit a lot. But as the kids get older I find I don’t understand a lot of the words they use. I’m confused a lot of the time.”
“So Dad thought I could keep track of people he considers to be enemies. So I’m kinda like Charles Colson. My step-brother Barron tells me that this Colson guy made a list of Richard Nixon’s enemies. So now I have a purpose.”
“In case you don’t know about this list - I looked it up and found out that "Nixon's Enemies List" is the name of what started as a list of Nixon’s political opponents compiled by Charles Colson. Colson is one of dad’s heroes.”
“Dad thought he might give this job to my sister, but Ivanka is too busy with her upcoming line of designer burkas for the Saudi Arabia market. For Mohammed bin Salman Al Saud. He’s some king or prince in Saudi Arabia. He’s Jared’s best friend. Jared calls him MBS. He made Jared rich. MBS also married his cousin just like Rudy. Vanky says they will probably be moving to Saudi Arabia soon. Something about legal problems here in the US.”
“And then there’s Junior. I’m not sure, but I think he might have a drug problem. So does that woman he lives with. I went to their house once. Everything was covered in white dust. Little lines of white dust everywhere. Dad doesn’t trust Junior. Have you seen Junior and Kim on Twitter? They yell like dad, but I can’t understand what they’re talking about. I ask them but they don’t even remember what they were screaming about. They invite our kids over to their house. But Lara doesn’t want the kids anywhere near them.”
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