Spotted washing car windows at the corner of 42nd St and FifthAve in midtown Manhattan, Rudy Giuliani took a moment out to chat with me - as long as I gave him a tin of sardines and a couple of pieces of white bread.
“Cat - I smell sardines on your breath. I will talk to you about my troubles as long as you share a bit of your food with me. I’m starving.
“The staff at the soup kitchens refuse to serve me and I have been banned from most of the homeless shelters in Manhattan. I’ll be damned if I’m going to Brooklyn to try the kitchens and shelters there.
“Everyone knows me. I thought about hitchhiking down to Mar-a lardo, but rumor has it I am persona non grata there. Trump doesn’t know me now that I’m broke. I spent most of my money on his campaigns. Non of my ex-wives, including my cousin, want anything to do with me.
“My cousin-wife! She wants nothing to do with me. Dammit - we’re related - cousins - you’d think she’d treat family a little better.”
I asked him how the car window washing was going.
“Well Tom, I’ll tell you. Truthfully, I’m a little too old and slow to wash a window before the traffic light changes from red to green.
“The light change is just too fast. I really wish I would have changed that when I was still America’s Mayor. People listened to me back then. I was a somebody. Smoking cigars with Trump at my private club.
“Dressing in drag with Trump. Ah - those were the days.
“I really thought the guys at Four Seasons Landscaping would give me a job or some cash. I brought them a lot of attention. But they just gave me a bit of loose change and told me to get off their property.”
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