“I haven’t had any attention for a long time - I had to do something. My sense of style just wasn’t doing it anymore.”
Kyrsten Sinema, worried that she wasn’t getting the attention she needs to justify her existence, was speaking with me and explaining her decision to go independent.
“I didn’t want people to forget about me. And I wanted to do it before Trump does it. He is in the news less and less. I’m sure he’ll be switching something soon. Maybe his hair color. Maybe his skin color. He’s got to do something. He has to. No one’s paying any attention to him. I sure as hell don’t want to end up like him. He seems to be hated in every corner of the political world.”
“And look at me - I’m talking to a cat in order to get some attention.”
“I need the attention to justify my existence. I even briefly thought about marrying a German Shepard but I did not want to offend either of my Jewish supporters. I toyed with the idea of a Catherine the Great type of tryst with a horse. Bet that would’ve got me some attention. Maybe in 2024. I’m going to need to do something if I want to keep this job.”
#AdoptDontShop
Feline fans…
Please buy me a coffee. Nick is threatening to hire me out as breeding stock and as nice as that sounds - what if no female felines want me? I could not live with the shame of being a failed pussy prostitute.
ko-fi.com/tomthepissedoffcat