Got a call from Larry the No 10 Cat late the other night. He had just returned from the coronation of King Chuck Three, and to say he was not impressed would be an understatement.
“I’ll tell you Tom, I hope this is the last of these overly expensive burdens on the hard done by British taxpayers, who are hardly able to feed their families.
“Colossal waste of time and money. I snuck in thinking they might need me to ‘chase a mouse away from under the king’s chair.’ Remember that little ditty from your childhood?
“I waited and waited but no mouse showed. However the place was full of rats disguised as self-important Tories fresh from a night of booze, drugs and rental women. Not unlike the Prince’s funeral. But this one was not held at No 10 as the Sunaks had just had the place renovated and new carpet laid.
“So the celebratory orgy was held at BoJo’s new estate in Herne Hill, in a constituency where he might stand a chance of being re-elected.
“Many of the cabinet ministers arrived late, after the event had commenced. Partly drunk most were, and all were equipped with hip flasks as these events seem to go on forever.
“The only entertainment was the singing of hymns of some sort - I think they were hymns. I couldn’t stand the sound and went outside until the racket stopped. I haven’t heard noise like that since my cousin, Tiger had his testicles removed at home by a 12 year old wannabe veterinarian.
So Charlie is now retired.
Never understood what he did other than joy riding in his plane and diddling Camilla. As for her - she is now the lady of the castle. BTW there were rumours flying at the post coronation booze up - is Camilla the King’s cousin? It would make sense and follow an age old tradition of the royalty.
Hopefully this is the final coronation. It’s way past time to stop this ancient expensive nonsense.
Long live the King?
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