Laughed out of court Steve Bannon takes to hiding in his basement with Lindsey Graham
They took to the sofa and started drinking heavily
“If I still had a license to practice law I would’ve won that for you guys. Hey, you got any scotch? I could use a scotch. It’s dark in here. Why don’t you turn on the lights.”
“No lights. We’re Republicans. We don’t like light. Exposes too much. Rudy, what the hell are you doing here anyway?
“You’ve got better liquor. I’m sick of that 2 dollar wine. Lindsey, can I borrow a couple of bucks?”
“Fuck off Rudy. You owe me too much already. Get a job Rudy. We’ve got serious problems here. I thought if I just declared myself about the law and above subpoenas I’d be okay. You know ‘The Trump Defense”. Turns out I was wrong. Trump lied to me. What are we going to do Steve? I can’t go to prison. I’m too pretty. I don’t speak the lingo. They boys at the baths are trying to teach me but it’s so difficult. And I’m too fragile for prison Steve.”
“Don’t sweat it. You’ll be in a Georgia prison. Your soft southern belle accent will serve you well. We just continue to use the ‘Trump defense’. Just stall. Delay.
“Relax, someone will pardon us eventually. The country is full of Trump judicial appointees. Most of them don’t know jackshit about the law. Look at the Supreme Court.
“How about we make a deal to tell all we know about Trump and January 6th. That’s all the J6 committee wants. They don’t want us. They want Trump. I can’t go to prison again. Last time I was in prison they hosed me down like a dog and only gave me one shirt. It was hell.”