"Not a raid," says Trump "I just called the FBI to help me open a safe at Mar-A-Lardo"
Given the state of the FBI during Trump years, they may be just destroying evidence and recovering furniture stolen from the White House
“It’s not a raid. I just called the a few of my FBI friends to open a safe.
“I cannot remember the combination and was going to read the documents and reminisce about my first four years as boss of the world. Melania and Barron know the combination but they won’t take my calls. I don’t even know where they are. Haven’t seen them in weeks.
“Last I heard they were in DC having a nice visit with Merrick Garland. They got to be friends with him shortly after the election was stolen from me.They may be in Europe somewhere now. Melania has relatives there. I know she cleaned out her closet in her suite and our joint bank account before she disappeared. Doesn’t matter, I think my lease-to-own agreement with her rental company is up. And I think there was a clause in the agreement stating that she would never testify against me. Really wish I had a lawyer other than Rudy.
“Junior knows the combination - or he used to know it. I don’t know what’s with him these days. No memory left. Kimmy and him can’t even remember to shower. I stopped inviting them to Mar-A-Lardo a while back. The stench emanating from them was getting to be unbearable. Enough to make a maggot gag. Their house smells like a barn.
“So now do you understand that it wasn’t a raid? Just some old friends getting together.
“By the way, do you happen to know if the Secret Service detail will be allowed to live with me in Leavenworth? What’s the policy on that? Does Leavenworth have a golf course? Should I bring my clubs?”
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