Plans for White House 'repurposing' and Lincoln Memorial found in the boxes Trump stole
"Daddy was planning on turning the WH into an Airbnb and the Lincoln Memorial was to be a night club. He's kinda off hotels now after the Old Post Office fiasco."
Failed president, real estate magnate and game show host, Donald J Trump had plans for various DC landmarks it was revealed today.
Officials examining the contents of the numerous boxes of documents that the Trumps had absconded with when they fled Washington last January were astounded to find architects’ drawings and blueprints for several projects.
Ivanka Trump explained the find to Day In The Life reporter, Tom the Pissed Off Cat on Saturday.
"Daddy was planning on turning the WH into an Airbnb and the Lincoln Memorial was to be a night club. He's kinda off hotels now after the whole Old Post Office fiasco.
“Arlington cemetery was to be plowed under and transformed into an amusement park - much like Disneyland. We were going to call it Trumpland - the Happiest Place on Earth. And the Washington monument was to be a tribute to Daddy’s manhood.”
When it was pointed out that the whole “Trumpland” thing would result in an avalanche of lawsuits brought by Disney Corp, Ivanka replied, “Oh we don’t worry about stuff like that. Nothing ever happens to Daddy. Do you have any idea of the number of lawsuits he has been named in? I’m sure it’s over a gazillion by now and nothing ever happens. No fines, no jail terms. Most never reach court. And he’s done some really fucked up shit.
”He even beat a rape rap this year."
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