FBI sources say that classified documents were not the only discovery at Mar-a-Lago.
An FBI spokesman says that a 38 year old woman was found chained up in a dark damp room which appeared to a storeroom for Diet Coke and ketchup.
“She only had a vocabulary of about 300 words, similar to Eric, which leads us to believe she may be Eric’s fraternal twin, although she does display the odd flash of intelligence. We are awaiting the results of DNA testing.”
For years rumors of a Trump twin have circulated among the press, who have long maintained that “Eric is too stupid to have found his way out of the birth canal. He must have had a guide or something.”
This is a breaking story and will be updated.
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