I was chatting with Bibi Netanyahu the other day and I asked him what the fuck he was trying to accomplish by destroying the Middle East and murdering citizens.
“I’m just going with the plan that Trump and I concocted. We are fond of war and getting attention. Putin and Jong are giving us a hand.
“Soon Trump will rule the western hemisphere and I’ll have the eastern. We’ll find some sort of roles for Vlad and Kim - fellow egotists.
“If I were a cat I’d be heading for the hills. All four of us hate animals - they get more attention and affection than we do. We want our images on currency. That said - Jong-Il does enjoy BBQ dog.”
We cats have been having meetings about how to deal with this lunacy. One of our leaders has declared, “It’s time for us to return to our home planet. This place is rapidly becoming inhabitable. I’m making transportation arrangements as we speak.”
I must admit I was shaken, and I asked if I could bring Nick.
“No two-legs are coming. They’re responsible for this travesty. So you guys start getting busy slashing the arteries of the two-legs, the bodies of your servants cannot join us. They’ll get what they deserve for their complacency. It’s the merciful thing to do.”
I asked Bibi what happens to the “plan” if Trump is defeated.
Bibi smirked and replied, “The ballot boxes are in the process of being stuffed. I just hope they don’t realize there are more votes than eligible voters.”
Anyway, we felines are out of here.
In the words of the immortal Douglas Adams - RIP -
“So long and thanks for all the fish.”
#Kamala for President!
#AdoptDontShop #SlavaUkraini #HeroyamSlava
#NeverMetAnAnimalIDidNotLikeExceptThatBigMeanOrangeCatAtTheEndOfTheBlock
Animals are so much better than humans